Influential Media
The works that made me
Here I'm leaving a collection of all of the media I've experienced that had significant impact on me. How I see the world, how I approach creative work, and just things that have rented space in my mind since I witnessed it. The type of work that I wish I could experience for the first time again. I'll leave you with links to access each work, maybe you can experience them for the first time in my stead.
Internet Story
This one goes way back for me. I must have seen it shortly after it's release. I watched it just before I was really getting onto the internet, though at that point my experience on the internet would be largely limited to Horseisle, Deviantart, and iscribble. My dad showed it to me off of his laptop, I don't remember him caring too much about it, but I insisted we watch it. The feeling of dread it gave me was something that at that stage of my life was entirely new to me. Maybe it's just me and my nostaliga for it but when I think about it, watch it, read through the comments, it still gives me shivers. I'm grateful for that. Just remember, When you go looking for death, you'll be sure to find it.
this house has people in it
This house has people in it is a masterclass in disorienting an audience. It's the type of video you watch and are left with very little to say but "What the fuck was that." Even upon rewatches it is decidely difficult to parse. That is where this house has people in it fools you, as the video itself is essentially the beginnings of a code, and anyone with the drive and wherewithal to unlock the secrets of this house has people in it will be met with upwards of 8 hours of content to comb through. Anyone who noticed the link at the end of the video and then thought to input the same access code as is shown at the beginning, of course. Really this house has people in it is so thoroughly filled with details and clues, it just really tickles that ARG sensibility in my brain that loves to hunt for secrets. I have a strong love for media that rewards observant viewers, and I seethe with envy towards the people that got to see this aired live, given no context to what this was or what the hell was going on. This level of hidden meanings and codes waiting to be broken has been something I desperately have wanted to include in my work. I'm waiting for my opportunity to create an ARG runway, marinating in sheer cataclysmic desire for it. While we wait for my time to produce that runway of my dreams, give this house has people in it a watch, and be careful not to catch Lynks.
myhouse.wad
Following the trend of "things are not quite as they seem..." comes myhouse.wad. A Doom 2 map dedicated to doomworld.com user Veddge's late friend. With Veddge's added modern amenities. I'll have to be honest with all of you. I've never played Doom 2. I heard about this map through youtube last summer. Saw some videos about it being more than it seems, some playthroughs. I, always the one to need a pure experience, immediately went to a silent playthrough. I did not get it. Like, yeah, I watched it before bed in my friend's dimly lit basement. The atmosphere built by this map alone making me glance up continually to the black hallway just out of the salt lamp's orange haze. It spooked me, so I swapped to something more lighthearted and went to sleep. The next day I finished watching -you may notice a trend here in the media that tends to stick with me- I had no idea what the hell just happened. What WAS that. I switched to an explanation video, a runthrough detailing the story and all the insane quirks that were there specifically to cause seasoned Doom 2 players unease. The tiny details astounded me. I don't think I can really even convey to you what this map is in a cohesive way. Its game breaking, its an ARG, its freaky, it makes you feel like you're going INSANE, it's also one of the most touching and affecting stories I've ever experienced. The two mentioned earlier, yeah, they affect me. They give me the shivers, I hold such reverence for those videos and how they shaped me and the way I view creativity. This one made me cry. It honestly feels ridiculous to even type that but I think about what's being said with this map, the layers of grief, love, resilience, but most of all: that despite everything, all of these experiences mattered. Because at the end of it all, he's right. Happiness has to be fought for.
Bloodborne
If you came here onto my page because you know me and you're somewhat interested in my work then there is no way you don't know Bloodborne. I can't shut up about it. Maybe I don't mention it for a while but then it comes up again and its over for everyone. I LOVE this game. Have I finished it? No! I'm too busy! I never got past Rom! Thats fine! Let me live! For all the praise I would throw this game's way, it's stiff linearity makes it kind of difficult to put down and pick back up after years of pause. Soulsborne games tend to be that way for me, but let me get to singing it's praises.
I never got into Dark Souls. I tried it in 9th grade when the boy I had a crush on told me to download it and he'd help me learn to play it. Sold. Or so I thought. I just didn't like it. Sorry. I at 14 was not remotely interested enough in learning an utterly unforgiving game. Something about dudes in plate armor just duking it out in a faded high fantasy landscape, it was too macho. It lacked something. Just not my vibe no matter how hard I tried to be one of the boys. I'd work out the roots of that desire no less than ten years later.
In 2021, I had a girlfriend. Most importantly, she had a game. A game called Bloodborne. She couldn't figure out how to play it so it sat in her collection for years. I had heard of it before, I vaguely remembered another past boy that played it. Sure, I'll give it a try. "I didn't like Dark Souls so no promises I'll keep playing it" I warned her. The next couple hours were nothing short of a life-changing experience for me. Where Dark Souls had been so stiff and made me tense, trying to defend every impact and wait for the exact right moments to strike, Bloodborne was so lively. There was so much action, it was so gory, it was slimy, it was gross. Really gross. The atmosphere of wandering into this witch hunt was enthralling. How you slink through the shadows, slaying beasts as a hunter does. Or you figure you just can't beat this mob and run straight through the map and past everyone that would prevent you. Guess which I chose. But oh, it got me. I'm weak to good monster designs. Where Dark Souls lost me on dudes in plate armour Blooborne reeled me right back in with some good slimy suffering monsters that take their agony out on any unfortunate enough to enter Yharnam during a night of the hunt. I was enchanted by this lovecraftian nightmare, I think monsters are portrayed best when they're suffering. Why they suffer you learn as you play. Why has this city gone mad? What is the old blood? Why do we fear it? Why is there a man on top of a tower that relentlessly mows me down with gatling gun fire when I'm just trying to do my GOD damn job? What is with the sudden shift from the natural horror of grime, blood, and insanity to ethereal beings that glow delicately, drawing you in so they can hit you with a tentacle-like protrusion that sucks your brains out and kills you immediately. It's got layers. It's a devolution from a horror that's easy to understand, angry mobs who hunt down anything unlike themselves, to a cosmic horror that would burst the minds of the scholars cursed with the desire for knowledge.This manifestation of madness comes from a mind teetering on the very brink, but has a sane mind ever produced anything of true significance?
So go, join the hunt.
